Now where was I?

Whew, that was fun! I feel like I've been on vacation for the past two weeks. I think I managed to attend Oktoberfest 8 or 9 times - so at least half of the days. Impressive that I'm still standing, no?

The major thing I learned from my marathon of festing is this: if you don't have a reservation, go during the week, and go early! There was a huge difference in crowd level between weekends (including Fridays) and weekdays. On a weekday one can get a seat in pretty much any tent for lunch and some afternoon drinking, without waiting in line or getting shoved around by too many drunken frat boys. The music is a little more low-key and traditional during the day, but it picks up in the early evening, which is about the same time that the dancing on the benches starts. Speaking of Oktoberfest music, how long until I get these songs out of my head? (The playlists at the tents are very repetitive, to say the least.)

Now I've got about four days of 'normal life' before visitors and travel descend upon me again. So, if I've owed you an email for the past month or so, expect to finally get a reply this week. Right after I hose down the apartment. And figure out what to do with 50 green tomatoes...

There's a club for everything

Really? This is a team sport? Practiced by men?


OK, listen up Germans. I know how much you like to use English words (such as, say, 'club'). But sometimes, when you only put part of what you are saying in English, and leave part in German, you can end up with a meaning you never intended...

I don't think these guys ever figured out why we were so fascinated with their shirts.

TnAL exclusive: Sarah Palin at Oktoberfest

Look who I ran into at the Wiesn!

The home stretch

This Oktoberfest business is seriously exhausting! I've spent 6 of the past 11 days at the Wies'n, and I'm planning to go at least one more time. I'm going to need a vacation once this is all over.

The other night we had dinner at the Käfer tent, one of the smaller tents at the Wies'n. Käfer is a well-known gourmet shop and restaurant in Munich, and the fare at their Oktoberfest tent is similarly pricey and delicious. Despite the fancy-schmanciness of the tent, the evening still involved plenty of giant steins of beer and dancing on the benches to ridiculous live music.

Apparently my bedirndled friends and I were looking particularly adorable all sitting in a row, because strangers kept coming by and taking our pictures. It was kind of like being extremely minor celebrities.

What else? My least favorite day was last Saturday, the most crowded day of "Italian weekend". Normally I would have never attempted to go on the busiest day of Oktoberfest, but we had friends in town just for the weekend and gosh darn it I was determined to get them into a tent. We woke up ridiculously early and were standing in line waiting outside the Löwenbräu* tent at 8:30 AM. The doors finally opened at 8:45 (after the lion let out a big roar), and we scrambled to find a spot for our group. We were downing our first liter of beer before 9:30. Breakfast of champions. The atmosphere couldn't have been more different than that at the Käfer tent. The crowds were insane. I headed home rather early, but not before our fancy Maβ-holding contest.


It's not like I've been drinking non-stop this whole time... I've also gone on a couple rides here and there. There are three roller coasters and a dozen or so other rides interspersed between the stands selling sausages and gingerbread hearts on strings. Who decided that big, stomach-churning rides would go well with giant steins of beer?



Overall I'm enjoying Oktoberfest more than I expected to. I mean, not the puke in random doorways all over the city, or the roving bands of drunken tourists, but the rest of it has proven to be pretty darn fun. Who would have thought?

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* I know what you're thinking, but here in Germany Löwenbräu is not the same cheap crappy beer that it is in the US. I have no idea why that is.

Oktoberfest advice: avoid these common injuries!

As fun as Oktoberfest is, there are still some dangers lurking, particularly where beer steins are involved. This friend (who will remain somewhat anonymous) demonstrates a couple common Oktoberfest injuries for us. See this vertical welt on her forehead?


Here she reenacts how she got it:

My advice: don't do this.

Injury number two: blisters from repeatedly lifting a Maβ beer stein.

My advice: um, bring weightlifting gloves?



Anyone else sustaining any Oktoberfest injuries?

Oktoberfest waitresses demonstrating their mad skillz

The waitresses at the Wies'n must start training months in advance for all this beer-carrying.


Looks like seven liters... not bad.






Eight! Even better.

One waiter, too:


Pretty impressive, no?

Breathalyzer, Oktoberfest style

This Fräulein was administering breathalyzer tests to the guys at the table behind us in the Hippodrom, but not for the usual reasons. They weren't interested in finding out whether they were fit to drive (the Premier of Bavaria has already educated them about that). Instead, they were receiving certificates proudly boasting the blood alcohol level they had achieved.

In other Oktoberfest news, there's a dirndl-gate! And it has nothing to do with a boob popping out. As if that weren't enough, lederhosen have their own scandal going on. Who knew old-timey clothing could be so controversial?

Two days down, 14 more to go

Greetings from Oktoberfest 2008! We are still alive and well. The city is awash with drunken tourists and locals alike, most of them wearing some kind of tracht, or at least funny hats (note to self: take more photos of funny hats). Many precious memories are in the making here, I tell you, and we are only one weekend in to this 16-day festival. I'd like to take this opportunity to remind Headbang8 about our mutual agreement to not post embarrassing photos of each other.


The Hippodrom - supposedly the young, hip, flirty tent with a high number of celebrity sightings. We did see some guys being followed around by video cameras and a boom mic, but alas none of us were able to recognize them.


The Weinzelt (wine tent - no maβes here!)


The Ochsenbraterei (ox roaster). This was our third tent of the day yesterday. I hardly have any pictures from inside. Probably better that way.


If you want an animal roasted on a spit, Oktoberfest is the place for you!


The pregnant chick stole our beers!


One popular festival song here in Germany is about playing cowboys and Indians (which I for one take offense to - how dare the Germans appropriate our cultural heritage! WE come from the land of cowboys and Indians, that's OUR childhood game, dammit!). Anyway, the song comes with a choreography kind of like the Macarena, except with lassos. Really, I am not making this up.


Our neighbors from the next table over get a little fresh with our kilt-wearing Scot.


I was all set to declare the Weinzelt the most sophisticated tent, and then the band came out wearing giant condom suits. Why yes, those are enormous hairy balls that jiggle when they move their legs. Thanks for asking.

More to come!

Oktoberfest: O'zapft is!

You'll be pleased to know that the beer was paraded in and arrived safely at the Wies'n. The first keg was successfully tapped by the mayor at the stroke of noon.



Here we go!

Does Oktoberfest have its own language?

All over the place I've been hearing references to Bayerisch (the Bavarian language) in connection to Oktoberfest. The official website has an English-Bayerisch dictionary. A friend gave me an Oktoberfest song book* which also includes a Bayerisch phrase guide (and an interview with Roberto Blanco, of all people. WTF? All I know is that if he's performing at Oktoberfest, I am so there.) Advertisements seem to be tossing in a Bayerisch phrase or two all over the city.

This confuses me a bit ("this" meaning the whole Bayerisch thing, although the Roberto Blanco thing also has me a little baffled). First of all, despite warnings to the contrary from non-Bavarian Germans, Bayerisch is not the default language in Munich. German is. People don't speak Bayerisch at me,** and they don't speak it around me. In my eight months here, I have heard very little Bayerisch, and trust me, I do a lot of eavesdropping. You want to see a city where people speak dialect instead of a real language? Go try Zurich, because Munich is pretty solidly a convert to the Hochdeutsch camp. I hear more English and Italian here than I do Bayerisch. Secondly, rumor has it that Oktoberfest is sooooo commercial and so very overrun with tourists that the locals, for the most part, are oh-so-fed-up, and don't even hardly go to the Wies'n anymore.

So whom, exactly, is going to be speaking all this Bayerisch at me? Is it one of those scenes like Colonial Williamsburg or a Renaissance fair where the employees get all crazy into character and refuse to speak like a normal person? Somehow I'm skeptical. But just in case, I'm arming myself with a few key vocabulary words and phrases. Feel free to print this out and carry it around as a cheat-sheet. Oktoberfest starts tomorrow!

Z ' dringga mächd i biddschee a Mass! - I'd like to have a beer.
biddscheen - please / you're welcome.
Deaf i mi zu dia hisizn? - May I sit down here?
Naa - no
Zoin - The bill, please.
aufmandeln - to aggrandize oneself, especially when you do not find any free seats in the beer tents.
aufstöin - to donate a beer.
Bierdimpfe - notorious beer drinker, "tavern potato".
Fetznrausch - totally drunk.
Gaudinockerln - luxuriant breasts
Weißbia - wheat beer (only in the smaller beer tents at Oktoberfest)
Deaf i Dia a Busserl gem. - I'd like to give you a kiss.
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* The Oktoberfest Song Book comes on a long blue ribbon, so that you can hang it around your neck. Very handy!
** As if trying to prove me wrong, a little old lady actually came up to me and spoke Bayerisch in the grocery store today.

In anticipation of Oktoberfest

Ah, our first Oktoberfest as residents of Munich is just around the corner. You can tell it's the season due to all the stores trying to get you to buy tracht (traditional Bavarian clothing, ie dirndls and lederhosen) these days. It's in all the shop windows.

My one previous trip to Oktoberfest was about 10 years ago. I don't remember it too vividly (despite not having a drop to drink there). I came to Munich from where I was living in eastern Germany to meet up with my parents, who planned their vacation specifically to coincide with Oktoberfest. I remember going on some rides (and wondering who came up with the brilliant idea to combine rides with excessive drinking) and walking through the stalls selling gingerbread hearts, chocolate-covered fruit, and hats shaped like beer steins. We poked our heads into a beer tent, which was packed full of people enjoying a big oompa band. My dad was dying to find a place to sit down and have a beer, but was sadly overruled by me (dislike of crowds) and my mom (who was beginning to come down with a stomach virus).

Our guest room (and the fold-out couch) is going to get a lot of use in the coming weeks, and we are thrilled to see all the friends who are coming to visit. That said, I'm a little apprehensive about the Oktoberfest schedule that I've got laid out before me: between going with visitors and with local friends, I'm planning to spend at least 5 days in beer tents alone. Don't get me wrong - I do love drinking with friends. And I can't wait to have an excuse to wear my dirndl. What I don't love is crowds, smokey hot crowded tents, waiting in lines to get into smokey hot crowded tents, and big masses of hot sweaty people. It remains to be seen whether I will love Oktoberfest or hate it. Either way, I'll be sure to blog all about it.

For those looking for Oktoberfest information, here's a handy downloadable map of the Wies'n which shows where the various tents are located (for those of you lucky enough to have reservations at tents). The official Oktoberfest site is here. You can also find general schedule information here. The opening parade is Saturday morning, and then o'zapft is!

10 things to do in Munich for less than $5

Oh, that pesky dollar, more and more worthless every day (currently around $1.56 to the euro). I know, I know, I feel your pain – I have earned the wrong currency at several points in my life… most notably marks back in the late 90s. At any rate, for those Americans still hoping to enjoy a European vacation this year while exchanging their banana currency for cold, hard euros, I thought I’d offer up a couple money-saving tips for the cities I know well. First up, Munich.

Free city walking tour. The Red Shirt city tours meet at the gold statue in Marienplatz at 10:45, 11:45, and 15:00, and are completely free (although tipping the guide is expected). The tour covers a lot of sights around the city center and lasts a couple hours.

Blade night! Every Monday in summer (weather permitting), there is a free rollerblading event through the streets of Munich. The whole thing is amazingly well-organized and attracts thousands of bladers. No roller blades? You can event rent those at the venue – get this – for free! And did I mention the whole event is free? Even if you make the requested 2 euro donation (for which you get a drink), you still come out well under $5 for an evening of fun. And exercise!

One-euro museums. Several of the best museums in Munich cost only a euro on Sundays. To avoid the crowds, go as early as possible.

Drink a beer. Good beer is cheap and plentiful in this city. A half-liter of refreshing helles or foamy weissbier costs less than 3 euros in most establishments (a lot less if you buy bottles at a store – plus you can walk around with an open beer in this city without breaking the law. Fun and novel in itself for most Americans!).

Climb to the top of the Peterskirche. For €2.50 you can climb to the top of the tower for a beautiful view. (Come on, you know you love going to the top of things.)

Eat a cheesy pretzel. A delicious taste of Bavaria for less than 2 euros. They can be found at bakeries all over the city.

Check out a church or two. It’s not Italy, but Munich still has a couple of beautiful churches full of art and dead saint bits (bonus: churches are usually quite cool inside on hot days, too). Try the Frauenkirche, Peterskirche, and Theatinerkirche to get you started (find them on any map of the city center).

Picnic in a beer garden. Don’t want to spend money on overpriced beer garden grub? Raid a local supermarket for picnic supplies on your way there. In Munich, you can bring your own food to beer gardens as long as you purchase your beverages on the premises.

Get lost in the Viktualienmarkt. I love the sights and sounds of the Viktualienmarkt, the large daily outdoor market in the center of town. Even if you don’t buy a thing, a stroll through the stalls can be extremely entertaining.

Get your fest on. Seriously, there is some sort of festival going on in Munich at pretty much all times (as Headbang8 recently pointed out), and admission doesn't cost a thing. There’s the annual Starkbierfest; Tollwood is twice a year; the Auer Dult is three times a year. This summer is packed with 850^th anniversary parties for the city. And there’s another fest of some sort in the fall… I don’t know much about it, but I hear it involves beer.

So there you have it! Ten things to do in Munich for less than $5. And I didn't even mention the nude sunbathing...

The old city ring party

As part of the summer-long celebration of Munich's 850th birthday, the middle of the city was taken over this weekend for the Altstadtringfest. Despite the crowds and weather which alternated between oppressively hot and torrential downpour, we had a pretty good time sampling the offerings. And we saw a lot. A robot parade. A glorified science fair. Singing lesbians. A guy in a chicken suit riding a mechanical bull soccer ball. Concerts. Singing mechanical puppets.



My favorite event was the midnight acrobat show at Odeonsplatz last night. It was kind of a cross between De La Guarda and Cirque du Soleil, with a bunch of Bavarian history tossed in. The woman running up and down one of the towers of the Theatinerkirche was absolutely breathtaking. None of the photos of her turned out, but Scott took a great video I'll try to post sooner or later.



Today we took the opportunity to take our new tracht out for a spin (and silly us, forgot to have someone take a picture of us - but we did take a photo when we got home). There were plenty of other dirndls and lederhosen to see out and about, too, which I noticed only because we were dressed the way we were. You know how when you get a new car and then suddenly notice people driving that kind of car everywhere? Tracht is the same way.

Munich parties

We were this close to going away for the weekend, but in the end decided to stick around and check out the hundred million things going on in Munich. We just got back from a day at the Tollwood Festival out at the Olympiazentrum. Tollwood had been described to us as kind of a hippie festival gone commercial, and that was about what it felt like. The fairgrounds contained a mix of shopping, a variety foods, and eclectic beer gardens. There was also live music and other performances going on. I lunched on a fabulous vegan gyro. Long live the hippies!



Now we're resting up for a long night of partying at the Altstadtsringfest. The center of Munich has been closed off to traffic and a whole of of crazy things are going on in the various platzes. The acrobatics at Odeonsplatz sound promising, and I'm quite tempted to go check out a German rap group by the name of Blumentopf (flower pot). So many events to chose from!

And, as if today wasn't exciting enough already, we bought Scott some lederhosen this morning. Woo hoo!

Ready for Oktoberfest

Here it is, the new dirndl in all its glory. I love it, even though wearing it seems to reduce me to nothing but silly poses and twirling. Who knew girlie clothes could be so much fun?

Munich beach

Not only does Munich have surfing, but there's also a beach here. Well, not so much a beach as an outdoor bar with some dirty sand and a couple beach chairs, but hey, what do you expect? The nearest sea is a couple countries away.

We went to check out the Strand Bar last night. Located in the middle of the Corneliusbrücke spanning the Isar River (near the Deutsches Museum), the bar serves up a very limited selection of drinks, including mojitos (very good) and Weissweinschorle in a bottle (absolutely undrinkable). The atmosphere and location were enjoyable, and we would have loved to stay longer if it wasn't for these menacing clouds in the distance (see photo below). We grabbed our mojitos and made a run for it, getting to the next bar just as the deluge started. Good times.

Big pfun at the Pfarrfest

Last week we went to a Pfarrfest at a small parish church in Munich. A multi-generational crowd was gathered for food, drink, socializing and music. The preist worked the crowd, greeting everyone and making them feel welcome (upon learning I was from the US, he even broke out with a couple words of English). Dessert consisted of various baked goods prepared by the parishioners. This annual party had all the feel of a church celebration in a small American town, with two significant differences:

1) Lots of oompah music, and

2) Nuns drinking beer by the liter.

I'm really, really sorry for not snagging a photo of #2.

Tired of cycling while fully clothed?

Alas, our butts are planning to be out of town (at the Regensburg expat weekend, if you must know), and thus unable to participate in the Naked Bike Ride through Munich 2008 (NSFW) this weekend.

Which reminds me of a useful bit of German vocabulary: FKK (short for Freikörperkultur). It's basically a fancy abbreviation referring to nudity or nudism. You'd be surprised how often these three letters come up in everyday conversation around here.


translation of the sign: open fires, BBQing, and nudity forbidden!

Where am I supposed to ride this again?

Gotta love superfluous English. Although at least the 'outdoor' on my new bike makes a little more sense than the 'street racer' written in big letters on my skis. (Or could it be that I've been using my skis in the completely wrong environment all these years?)

Not unlike skiing, I learned to ride a bike too late in life to be very good at it. But cycling seems to be such a fun and convenient way to get around in Munich that I figured I might as well give it a try - while investing as little money as possible in the actual bike in case I only end up using it once. Nice bikes supposedly get stolen quite regularly in Munich, so I'm probably better off with my no-name 'outdoor' bike, anyway. Now to figure out the rules of the bike path...

Coming events in and around Munich

• The Eurovision Song Contest is coming up this Saturday, with the preliminary rounds on Tuesday and Thursday evening. If you love cheesy euro-pop, you won't want to miss it. Will the Eastern European countries continue to vote as a bloc and piss off the West, who has been voting in much smaller blocs since the contest began?

• Munich is turning 850 years old this year. To celebrate, a lot of activities are going on here this summer, including the Long Night of Music on May 31st.

• The Regensburg Expat Weekend meetup is coming up on June 21-22.

Happy birthday, Mom!